A few years ago, pre-pandemic, we drove home to NJ from Florida because of unexpected flight cancellations. All five of us and our luggage in a tiny rental car. It was something.  And, in today’s blog post I’m sharing a valuable lesson I learned recently about our precious family road trips.

Ironically, that wasn’t the first time we’d driven to or from Florida. This was actually the first year we flew because we finally had enough money to do that. In years past, our vacations were almost all car trips to keep us in budget. For many years, if we wanted to leave our home, we had to do it on the cheap. I felt guilty about this for too long.

My best childhood memories are when my whole family took vacations. It was rare. As the youngest, my siblings were mostly grown and out of the house for my childhood, but there were a few great trips that are etched indelibly in my brain.

So, as a parent, I felt huge pressure to create “magical” travel experiences for my kids. Needless to say our dreams were never truly in budget and for many years I felt like less than because of what I was providing them. Turns out, joke was on me.

Recently my kids, who are grown and now have many trips by car and plane under their belts, were reminiscing about our family vacations. You know what some of their fondest memories were? That crazy car trip. They had so many laughs retelling about squeezing into that car and the spectacle of mom and dad making travel plans on the fly in the airport (and of course disagreeing loudly in the process!).

It went on and on like this. The time we stayed home and made it a “beach” week in our backyard. Sleeping on the floor together in my sister’s apartment because we couldn’t afford a hotel. The free waffles and stinky pool at the cheap hotel when we finally could stay out of my older sister’s hair while she hosted for Thanksgiving. All listed as “the best.”

Nearly every memory they brought up was a moment I either forgot because I didn’t think it was important, or I was trying to forget because I felt ashamed that it wasn’t good enough or more truthfully, I felt I wasn’t good enough.

All the things I wanted to forget, or considered a failure, my kids loved the most. It was a huge lesson: the memories are what matter, and you’re making them every day.

You don’t need fancy hotels, first class airfare or even soap shaped like a Mouse. Heck, you don’t even need to leave your house.

Time with your kids, no matter how or where you spend it, is what matters most.

On that note, if you’re feeling discouraged and are wondering if you need parenting support, I can help.  Check out my parenting coaching services and reach out for a complimentary 15 minute consultation.

~ Cristie XO

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